39. Learning from creative failure
A gentle post-mortem for when projects go sideways
I debated with myself a good deal about the title of this week’s newsletter because of the word “failure.”
It’s not so much that I dislike the word “failure,” but rather that I think failure has a bad rap. Failure is (or should be) a neutral event; I believe we need to strip “failure” of its destructive charge and ease the fear it so often creates. When we fear something, we naturally try to avoid it, and there’s a big difference, both intellectually and emotionally, between making decisions and acting from a place of avoiding failure than from a place of pursuing success.
Because failure has a lot to recommend it! If we better understand what failure is, what good it can bring us, and explore how to get to those insights, we can lessen its sting and the stranglehold that the fear of failure has on our dreams and decisions.
Defining failure
What do we even mean when we say “failure”? Do we mean a major project crashing and burning and wasting a whole quarter’s worth of work or an entire yearly budget and getting fired and being blacklisted and never working again and becoming a hermit no one will talk to?
Ok, breathe. If we take a second to not catastrophize, another definition of failure reveals itself.
Failure occurs when a project, idea, or experience doesn’t achieve its intended outcome or falls short of expectations.
When we talk about failure like this, it suddenly becomes a lot more…well, chill, doesn’t it? A lot of things in life don’t achieve their intended outcomes or fall short of expectations: A movie that wasn’t as good as you thought it would be. A cake that doesn’t rise. A date you were hopeful about that turns out just kinda boring. An adventureful vacation that ends up leaving you more tired than refreshed when returning to work. An energizing new job that quickly becomes a slog. A relationship that ends when you didn’t want it to. A business idea that never takes off.
These are failures, all of them, by definition. Failures of different stakes and complexities. You could take any one of these and say that that failure means a particular impact or has a fixed significance, but in many cases that’s not actually true! For example, you could say “My cake didn’t rise, therefore my daughter’s birthday party is ruined.” but that “therefore” is a sneaky, lying little projection that our brain, in service of “protecting” us from worst-case scenarios, whips up. (Thanks, brain!) But it’s not actually literally true that “cake didn’t rise = party ruined,” is it?
When we apply the actual definition of failure—something that doesn’t achieve its intended outcome or falls short of expectations—vs. our own dreaded-impact-based definition of failure, it helps us compartmentalize and contextualize the failure from any number of possible impacts. Meaning, instead of automatically reacting to “the party is ruined,” all we have to respond to is “the cake didn’t rise.” This lets us stop telling stories about failure and instead take action. It allows us to move from “cake didn’t rise = party ruined” to “cake didn’t rise = procure cake alternative.”
I picked a low-stakes example here for a reason, and I definitely don’t wish to make light of things like relationships ending or businesses folding. But I hope you can see the parallels between the cake-fail catastrophizing and any other kind of failure that might befall us—even failures in the creative realm.
When we talk more specifically about creative failures, there are a few extra considerations. With creative or artistic projects, there’s also potentially the more personally painful feeling of a vision unrealized or some meaningful self-expression that ends up ignored or misinterpreted or poorly received. Ouch.
But creative failures are no different than the cake example above; there’s the terrible story we tell ourselves about what they mean for us, our creative practices, our talents, and our careers…and then there’s the pragmatic, dispassionate methodology of “procure cake alternative.”
Let’s always strive to procure cake alternatives.
What we can gain from failure
There are a number of things we can gain from a project or experience that fails.
Learning opportunities: Viewing failure as an opportunity to learn encourages a growth mindset, which is crucial for personal and professional development.
Resilience: Embracing failure builds grit and resilience, qualities that help individuals (and whole teams!) bounce back stronger and more determined.
Experimentation mindset: Almost definitionally, experimentation often leads to failure. And experimentation and “failing fast” are a key component of innovation! Without the willingness to fail and try again and again and again, truly creative, groundbreaking ideas might never emerge from the sea of safeness. And speaking of…
Risk-tolerance: Encouraging a culture that tolerates failure fosters risk-taking and increases our risk-tolerance, which is again essential for creative breakthroughs.
A gentle post-mortem for your next creative failure
Next time you find yourself with a big fat flop on your hands or dealing with the aftermath of a “first-pancake” type project, ask yourself the following questions to transmogrify the failure into something insightful.
1. What was the original vision or goal of the project?
Reflect on the initial intentions and desired outcomes of the project. Understanding the original vision helps clarify whether the failure was due to misalignment with goals, external factors, or something else. It can help you better diagnose exactly what didn’t go the way you wanted or needed.
2. What went well despite the overall outcome?
Identify and acknowledge the positive aspects and any successes large or small within the project. Rarely is there a project or idea with absolutely zero redeemable qualities! Recognizing what worked well can boost morale for yourself and any collaborators, as well as provide good insight into strengths and effective strategies to double down on for next time.
3. What were the main challenges or obstacles faced?
Reflect on the specific difficulties encountered during the project. Strive to be uncensored and understanding. Comprehensive and compassionate. Bringing to light the real challenges helps identify areas for improvement, blind spots you may have had previously, and potential solutions for future projects.
4. What could be done differently next time?
Consider alternative approaches and strategies that might lead to a different outcome. When you look back on what you did do, it can be easier to see moments where you could have done something differently. This encourages proactive problem solving for the next time around.
5. What do I currently feel about this failure, and what would I like to feel about it instead?
It’s ok to feel bad when things fail. It’s normal. It’s healthy. Take a good long moment to let yourself feel however you feel about whatever it was that went sideways. Then, think about how you would like to feel about an experience like this instead. Maybe instead of disappointed, you’d prefer to feel grateful you had the opportunity to even try. Maybe instead of angry, you’d prefer to feel humbled. Instead of embarrassed, you’d prefer to feel empowered with knowledge for next time. Give yourself a moment to really inhabit those preferred feelings. Write them down, even. Practicing feelings, as weird as it may sound, can help you access them in the future!
Over to you…
Let’s hear some of your most fruitful creative failures! What are some of the best lessons you’ve learned from failing, and how have you applied them moving forward?